Movie Review – The Fantastic Mr. Fox

Plot: After stealing from three wealthy farms, Mr. Fox and his family become fugitives as the farmers declare war, and won’t rest until Mr. Fox is found.

In the late 90’s and early part of this decade, Wes Anderson was one of my favorite filmmakers.  Rushmore and the Royal Tenenbaums are two of my favorite movies.  But after Tenenbaums, he released the very mediocre Life Aquatic and then the Darjeeling Limited three years later, his worst film yet.  But he’s back in a big way with his latest effort, the Fantastic Mr. Fox.  Although it’s animated, you can tell it’s a Wes Anderson movie.  The man has a very distinct style that is his own and no one else’s, often very quirky and off-beat.  Normally this style of filmmaking pisses me off to no end such as films like I Heart Huckabees or Burn After Reading.  They are just being weird for the sake of being weird but ultimately say nothing.  I accept Wes Anderson’s style because his weirdness actually enhances who the characters are, and the man writes damn good characters.  Fantastic Mr. Fox has these in bunches, which Anderson’s previous two movies did not have.  

This is a funny movie.  It’s not laugh-out-loud, but that’s okay.  The story is ‘meh,’ but the characters are off the charts hysterical.  The way they interact with each other and the environment around them is so much fun to watch.  This is credit to the writing, but the voice talents really give the characters their mojo.  George Clooney as Mr. Fox takes some getting used to, but the voice grows on you as the film goes on.  Jason Schwartzman is fantastic as Mr. Fox’s egotistical and underachieving son Ash.  Bill Murray – great as always.  But the man who steals the show is Wally Wolodarsky as Kylie the possum.  He’s portrayed as a little crazy and unstable (the great visuals attest to this), but his voice is so sensible and subdued.  I loved it. 

The best part is the relationship between the father and son, Mr. Fox and Ash.  Both characters are exactly the same, yet one is successful and the other fails.  Mr. Fox is so damn reckless, and literally digs himself into deeper and deeper holes, yet most of the time he comes out the winner.  His son Ash is exactly the same, only he fails miserably at everything he does.  What also makes this relationship fascinating is that Mr. Fox sees his son as different and an oddball, yet he can’t see that he’s the same way and instead bonds with his nephew, Kristofferson (Eric Anderson), who not only has all the talent in the world, but is very zen and has his head on straight.  Mr. Fox thinks Kristofferson is just like him, but they are two very different people.  Watching all these characters clash is what makes a Wes Anderson movie great.

The one big problem I had with this movie though is that the story is too impulsive.  What I mean by this is it just decides to ramp up whenever it wants to with no build up or explanation.  At the beginning of the movie, Mr. Fox decides he’s done stealing from farms, but resorts back to his old ways after years of retirement.  Just like that.  I understand that the character himself is impulsive, but I just didn’t buy this.  It just happens.  

There is also some of that “weird for the sake of being weird” element that adds nothing.  There is one scene in particular that brought me a great deal of frustration.  The characters just start dancing.  I know why they are dancing, but it felt way out of place, especially because everyone was acting so subdued throughout the movie to this point.  

If you are a Wes Anderson fan like me, you are going to love this.  The characters have all their quirks about them, especially in how they dress, which is what I expect in an Anderson flick. They face serious problems like death and family togetherness with a “whatever” attitude, but you still get the sense they care a great deal.  Even if you don’t know or like Anderson, you will enjoy this one a lot.  If anything, the stop motion animation is fun to watch.  You don’t see that anymore.

Rating:  8.0 out of 10.       

Top 10 Video Games

Video Games.   They’ve made us all lazy, but we love em’ anyway.  It’s hard to believe video games are more popular today then when they first hit our television screens in the mid-eighties.  And yes, I know there were video games before then, like Atari and other random systems in which the power adaptor took up half the apartment.  But I was introduced to video games through the Nintendo Entertainment System.  For me, the last great game system was N64.  Games today are nothing more than pretty colors and graphics.  Where’s the heart!  And they are so damn complicated.  I’m sorry, but I don’t have time to invest myself in learning 75 different button combinations.  I just want to jump on things.  So here is my list of Top 10 All Time Favorite Video Games.  Let the complaining begin!

10) Pac-Man (Arcade/Home Systems)

-Addicting.  Intense.  Maddening.  These are all words you could use to describe Pac-Man.  That little yellow ass bag causes quite a stir.  But I love the simplicity.  You eat pellets while being chased by ghosts.  But it’s really all about the orbs.  A real man goes for all the ghosts while they are still blue.  Don’t be a whimp.  Blinky (the red ghost) is by far the smartest of the bunch.  He is clearly the leader and always tricks you.  I hate him.

9) Goldeneye (N64)

-Does anyone remember the story mode?  It was perfectly fine, but it’s all about the multi-player for this one.  It was a pioneer for first person shooters and it was James Bond.  How could you go wrong?  With so many different modes and ways to kill people, it’s no wonder it garners a lot of respect in the gaming world.  Everyone had their own personal favorite modes of play, but for me it was License to Kill with proxy mines.  Tucking one of those babies under a floor ledge and watching someone’s screen go red was so satisfying.

8 – Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2: The Arcade Game (Nintendo)

-Based on the Arcade Classic and far superior to the original, this was an epic turtle adventure you couldn’t put down.  Non turtle fans can appreciate the game itself, but true turtle followers know it’s the best ninja turtle game ever made.  You fight everyone in this thing.  After battling through countless foot soldiers and insane bosses, you finally make it to Shredder at the end only to find out that he can clone himself and kill you with one attack.  Wow.  This was a hard one.

7) Dick Tracy (Sega Genesis)

-This is probably the most obscure game on the list.  And no, I’m not talking about that shitty Nintendo one that is literally impossible to play.  The Sega version was a straight up side-scroller.  Oh man, this was fun.  You get a pistol which is cool, but the best part is using your tommy-gun to shoot enemies in the background.  It was awesome.  It also has a legendary bonus stage, which I have to say I’m pretty damn good at.  This game also has the hardest level I ever played.  I still have nightmares about Stage 6-B.  It’s complete chaos.  If you’ve played this one, you know what I’m talking about.

6) Final Fantasy VII (PS1)

-I’ve never been so emotionally involved in a video game then I was for Final Fantasy VII.  I hate RPG games.  I hate them.  So it makes this game even that much more impressive for me.  It’s 3 discs long, but once you start, you can’t stop.

5) The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time (N64)

-Everyone knows how good this is, so I don’t need to go into length.  It’s everything you want in a video game.  But fuck the Water Temple. 

4) Street Fighter II (Sega Genesis)

-The best fighting game of all time.  The cast of characters is amazing.  I think Ryu is clearly the most talented.  But the feature that really separates this game from many others is the group battle.  Choosing a team, strategizing who to take and when, made it that much better.  It was always nerve racking when it came down to that last Zangief/Dhalsim fight.  What a battle…What a game.

3) Mario Kart Double Dash (Game Cube)

-All of the Mario Kart games are great, but this one really stands out for 2 reasons: 1) The special weapons.  2) The double character selection.  My friends and I played with all light kart characters, how could you not?  In retrospect, I played this game way to much during 4 years of college.  We discovered strategies and playing styles that I didn’t even know were possible in a Mario Kart game…Dissecting for hours what the best special weapon was.  Was it the 3 shells? The Bowser shell?  The Super Mushroom?  The Big Banana?  The only drawback to this game was that it almost gave me multiple heart attacks.  I just wish the blue shell could be outlawed.

2) Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out! (Nintendo)

 -The Rocky Balboa of video games.  Little Mac was a lovabale underdog who continued to rise up the ranks against seemingly unbeatable opponents.  Piston Honda.  Soda Popinski.  Bald Bull.  Macho Man.  You know the names.  Everything about this game works, especially the music.  This game gets your heart pumping from the opening screen.  All you see is darkness with a bell and a cheering crowd heard in the background.  It’s an epic game with the hardest video game boss of all time waiting for you at the end.

1) Super Mario Brothers 3 (Nintendo)

-It’s not only Mario’s greatest adventure, but it’s the greatest video game story ever told.  8 worlds, 7 kingdoms, countless power-ups, and of course the Koopa Kids, led by the biggest video game dick head of them all…Bowser.  Let’s not forget all the secrets to uncover.  This is a tough game to truly conquer.  Pipe World was mind boggling.  But nothing compares to the insanity that is Dark World.  Fighting Bowser for the first time is hard, but once you figure out how to beat him, you can do it over and over again with ease.  The game has fantastic replay value.  This is truly the greatest video game ever made.

TV Show Brawl Series: Saved by the Bell Vs Full House

There are some questions that may never be answered.  Does God exist?  Are we alone in the universe?  How many baseball players actually did steroids?  But one age old question that will be answered today is who would win in a brawl between the characters from Saved by the Bell and Full House.  2 classic shows – but just one winner emeriging victorious as supreme champion of cheesy 90’s sitcoms.  I don’t know about you, but I’m on the edge of my seat.  So as Michelle Tanner would say, “Grab some ouce-cream,” hitch a ride to the Max, and lets watch the spectacle together.

Match-up #1: Battle of the Main Characters

Zack Morris Vs Danny Tanner

Ah yes, the 2 big cheeses.  This is a tight first match-up.  Danny is tougher than he acts.  Remember when he proved his athletic prowess by helping win a 3 on 3 basketball tournament for charity?  Also, Danny would use a variety of cleaning supplies which include many deadly chemicals when you get them in your eye.  And he knows the intricate parts of all them.  I guess you could say he would clean Zack’s clock…hahaha.  But seriously.  Danny is a tough opponent, but Zack has the ultimate move that is just unblockable.  “Time!”  That’s right.  Zack could just call a time-out and freeze everything.  Danny would be helpless.  After calling time, Zack would then procede to hit Danny with his giant cell phone.  A bloody end to Mr. T as Kimmy Gibbler would say.

Winner: Zack Morris

Saved by the Bell: 1   Full House: 0

Match-up #2: Battle of the Fashionables

Lisa Turtle Vs DJ Tanner

The big fashion battle.  Although DJ matured on the show, she was always obsessed with fashion and how she looked.  Remember when she wanted to spend $160 on blowouts, “the raddest” sneakers this side of San Fran.  But Lisa was also a fashion obsessed maniac.  That’s what she always wanted to study in college.  So who would win between these 2 fashionables?  Well, I got to give it to Lisa Turtle on this one.  I think DJ gets a little too emotional sometimes.  She wouldnt hold it together.  And besides, Lisa is always on her guard.  She has to fend off Screech all the time.  Another Saved by the Bell victory.  An early 0-2 hole for Full House.

Winner: Lisa Turtle

Saved by the Bell: 2   Full House: 0

Match-up #3: Battle of the Goofballs

Samuel “Screech” Powers Vs Joey Gladstone

This is a very close fight, but lets face it – these guys are going to inflict more pain on themselves rather than each other.  Both fighters have a lot to offer here.  Screech is always involved with crazy schemes and science projects that tend to go awry.  Joey can psyche Screech out with his many voice talents and could always employ the help of Mr. Woodchuck.  Ultimately what this comes down to though is that Joey was a pretty good hockey player in college.  I think that gives him the slight edge.  Besides, Screech is a bit more accient prone than Joey.  He would probably lose the fight himself by getting struck by lightning just like on the show.  What a mess.  Score one for the House!

Winner: Joey Gladstone

Saved by the Bell: 2   Full House: 1

Match-up #4: Battle of the Forgettable Characters

Jessie Spano Vs Stephanie Tanner

Lets be honest.  We could have done without these characters.  They were just kind of there.  Nothing special about them.  But they were part of their respective shows and deserve a chance in the spotlight.  I think Jessie has the clear edge.  She’s going to train like crazy for this fight by studying every one of Steph’s moves, including the dreaded Mr. Bear Beatdown.  But we all know how this is going to play out.  Jessie will get to hyped up on caffine pills, freak out, and be the cause of her own demise, basically giving Steph the win by default.  After a quick “How Rude,” Steph ties it up for the Tanner clan.

Winner: Stephanie Tanner

Saved by the Bell: 2   Full House: 2

Match-up #5: Battle of the Hair

AC Slater Vs Uncle Jesse

Although both characters spend a lot of time on their hair, this one is not even close.  AC Slater destroys Uncle Jesse.  The guy is on the wrestling team, football team, and looks terrifying in a Bayside tank top.  What’s Uncle Jesse going to do?  Sing him a Beach Boys song.  Slater will not show Uncle Jesse any “mercy.”  An utter domination from the Bell.  It’s up to you know who to tie up for Full House…

Winner: AC Slater

Saved by the Bell: 3   Full House: 2

Match-up #6: Battle of the Perky

Kelly Kapowski Vs Michelle Tanner

 

They were beloved.  They were adorable.  They were sweet and nice.  But which one of them wins it all?  Let’s look at the stats.  Kelly was a cheerleader.  Michelle was a Honey Bee.  Kelly was Zack’s girlfriend.  Michelle bought a donkey one time.  It’s a tough one.  But I have to give this one to…Michelle.  Yup.  First of all, I just think Kelly is too darn nice.  She also needs to depend on other people.  Whether it be Zack or her short flirtation with Slater, she always needs to rely on a boyfriend.  She only gets by because of smarter friends Jessie and Lisa.  I just don’t see the fire.  Also, I think Michelle would have access to a very powerful weapon…Commet.  Yea, the Tanner dog.  Commet would obey her every whim.  Kelly’s cheerleading would be powerless against it.  So does Michelle come through in the clutch for Full House…”You Got it Dude.”

Winner: Michelle Tanner

Saved by the Bell: 3   Full House: 3

Uh-Oh.  We’re tied up.  Don’t worry, I was prepared for this.  It looks like we are going into sudden death.  I have 2 very special fighters waiting in the wings.  This one will decide it.

Match-up #7: Battle of the Annoying Sidekicks

Mr. Belding Vs Kimmy Gibler

Oh boy.  What a battle.  What can we say about these 2?  They are really fricking annoying.  But they’ll have to decide it.  I think this fight comes down to 1 important element.  Each fighter will pull out their best move, and this 1 move will determine it all.  So here it comes.  Mr. Belding’s annoying laugh against Kimmy’s bad foot odor.  Both draw at the same time.  Now Kimmy’s foot odor is strong, but Mr. Belding’s laugh is so deafening, it has the power to send the odor back towards Gibbler.  It’s a battle of wills my friends.  So who comes out on top…

 

Winner: Kimmy Gibbler

I just think the odor is a little stronger.  This foot got DJ pulled over one time by a cop.  Sorry Belding.

Final Score:

Saved by the Bell: 3   Full House: 4

Well there you have it.  The Full House crew barely comes out alive.  I guess that wraps it up.  And remember, “Every where you look it’s alright because you’re saved by the bell.”

-DanJewish

 

 

Poor Use of the Escalator

Sometimes people really piss me off, and by sometimes I mean all the time.  I was on the subway the other day and got quite annoyed.  Surprisingly it was not on the actual train.  It’s what happened afterwards that really got my yamakah spinning…

I had a long day.  My damn feet were tired and so I decided to take the escalator.  Normally I man up and walk the stairs, but this station has a shit load of stairs so I just couldn’t do it.  It was pretty packed as everyone power walked their way to the stairs and escalator which are right next to each other.  Now if you’ve ever been on an escalator which I’m sure most of you have, you know there isn’t much room. 

So I get on the escalator expecting a nice relaxing ride up to the surface.  But no…Instead I get a bunch of shit bags pushing and shoving and running their way up to the top.  Come on!  This is ridiculous.  The whole point of an escalator is to not move at all and let the movement take you up.  If you are going to shove people and run up anyway, then why not take the fricking stairs!!!  If they weren’t right next to each other or if the escalator was broken, then fine.  I can understand that.  But there is no reason to force your way up and push people such as myself out of the way!  I’m on an escalator, leave me alone.  The worst part is that several people were doing this.  I can’t talk about this anymore, it’s just too painful to relive.  Bottom line: If you plan on walking/running and you have a choice between stairs and the escalator…please take the stairs. 

This topic gave me 6 “Oh Veys” of annoyance out of 10.

-Dan Jewish

Movie Review – District 9

Plot: It’s been almost 30 years since an alien race crashed landed on Earth.  Their ship is damaged making it impossible for them to return home.  They live in terrible conditions in a place called District 9 in South Africa.  When the government tries to relocate them to a new facility, something goes terribly wrong with one of the government officials.

District 9 is a damn good movie, but I think people need to calm down.  It’s not one of the greatest ever made.  It’s getting a little more praise then it deserves.  Make no mistake though; it is something that should be seen.  I have to admit that when I saw the trailer, I thought it was just some gimmick like the Blair Witch Project, one of my least favorite movies of all time.  “Oh, so it’s an alien movie, but shot like a documentary.  Yea, we’ll see how this one turns out.”  Sure, I was a regular Sammy Skeptic, but I thoroughly enjoyed this.

There are only two great characters, but its enough.  The government official Wikus Van De Merwe (played by Sharlto Copley) is very likable at the beginning.  The movie does a great job of getting the audience on his side right away.  This is a good thing because bad things happen to this guy, but he also has some questionable actions.  Copley gives an outstanding performance here, probably the best acting I’ve seen so far this year.  Unfortunately the human antagonists are pretty ‘meh.’  This hurt the movie a little bit.  I would have liked to known more about the bad guys.  The other great character is Christopher Johnson (one of the aliens).  He’s one of the few aliens you get to know.  You really feel for this guy and that’s credit to the great direction.

Neil Blomkamp is the director.  This is his first movie, and boy does he have a bright future.  Some of the tension he creates had me sweating bullets.  Easily the best scene for me is when there is a huge standoff in a government building.  There are a lot of realizations about what’s been happening to some of the aliens that come to a head here and the character interaction was gut-wrenching.  It’s one of my favorite scenes so far this year.  The begining was also great.  Just watching the back and forth between the humans and aliens as they argue about being relocated was fascinating.  It was a very strong first half.

The special effects also need to be mentioned.  A lot has been said already about how good they look, and they do look really good.  The amazing thing is the budget was about $30-35 million yet they look so much better than some of the big budget movies like X-Men Origins: Wolverine where they are piss poor.  There are so many special effects these days that look like a fricking Saturday morning cartoon, but these actually look real dammit.  But the special effects are nothing if it’s a sub-par story, and District 9 is very strong in that area.

Unfortunately there were some things that bothered me.  The last third of the movie drags on forever.  This really knocked it down a few pegs in my book.  The climax keeps going and going and going.  There are too many character twists.  Enough already – just get to the ending.  I think it was wrapped up nicely and I like the ending a lot, it just takes forever to get there.  It gets so long that it starts to feel like a ‘meh’ sci-fi action flick.  This hurt some of the tension in the end, but you still get the emotional impact you crave.

So all in all, an impressive movie, but it’s not the greatest thing I’ve ever seen.  I think people are overrating it because of the way it was made.  Yes, it was very original and we’ve never seen anything like it done before, but I’m not going to give it 500 points just for that.  The Blair Witch Project was original and different too, but that movie had shitty characters and an even worse plot.  District 9 has a great story, and pretty good characters.  Definitely a must see, but lets calm down.

Rating: 8.0 out of 10.

Movie Review – Funny People

Plot: Popular and succussful comedian George Simmons (Adam Sandler) is dying.  He goes back to his roots and performs stand-up again.  He befriends a struggling comedian named Ira (Seth Rogen) to help write his jokes.  Ira gets more than he bargained for though as he has to deal with George’s dysfunctional life and relationships.

When I go see a movie called Funny People with Adam Sandler, I expect to laugh.  Despite a few chuckles early on, this movie really pissed me off.  It’s boring.  The characters are all assholes.  It can’t decide if it wants to be a comedy or a family drama.  Oh yea, and did I mention it was boring.  And it was almost 2 ½ hours long, come on!  Now this was made by writer/director Judd Apatow, who everyone is just in love with right now.  The only movie I’ve seen from him was 40 Year Old Virgin, which I liked quite a bit.  I thought this was going to be a nice little story about comedians.  Boy was I wrong.

The absolute worst part are the little obnoxious inside jokes.  I really hate this crap.  The same thing happened in Ocean’s 12.  Oh look at us, we’re having so much fun and laughing at each other’s jokes that only we can understand.  I didn’t pay 7 bucks so I could watch you entertain yourselves.  Entertain me please!  Let me explain what I mean.  So there are all these jokes about how Seth Rogen’s character Ira (a struggling comedian) loses too much weight because his only charm as a comedian was looking fat and funny.  Oh haha.  Get it?  Just like Seth Rogen in real life.  I couldn’t help but feel this was put in because Apatow and Rogen probably joke about it a lot and find it hilarious.  Well good for them.  I don’t think it’s funny.  And I don’t need it shoved down my throat throughout the movie.

Another thing I found mildly annoying was Apatow casting his own children as the only 2 kids in the movie.  Now to be fair, they were very cute, and even talented.  There was this one scene though that irritated me to no end.  Everyone is watching a tape of one of the daughters performing a song from Cats in a school play.  I don’t know if the performance was real or just done specifically for the movie, but it felt like I was watching Judd Apatow’s home movies.  I mean come on!  I want to watch a movie here, not your damn home videos.  This is ridiculous.  Not only that, but Leslie Mann who is Apatow’s real wife was also the mother of the children in the film, and she can’t stop talking about how great the performance is just like a real mother would.  The problem is she is not just telling a few relatives and close friends, she is telling thousands of moviegoers!  It just felt shallow.  Give me a break.  The moviegoer is unfulfilled.

But let’s take a look at the real issue – The movie can’t decide on its genre.  It tries to be both comedy and drama.  This works great sometimes such as movies like The Royal Tenenbaums.  The problem here is that it’s a half ass comedy and a half ass drama, so what do you get…a half-assed movie.  Now the first half was okay.  I got some laughs and it was mildly entertaining.  I especially like the interplay between Seth Rogen, Jonah Hill, and Jason Schwartzman trying to make it as actors and comedians.  They were great together, but this completely disappears in the second half.  What we get instead is an awkward, unfunny, poorly written family drama.  It’s dreadful to watch and it drags on forever.  Adam Sandler’s character George Simmons is trying to selfishly break up this family.  And the sad part is that you don’t like or want to root for any of these characters.  Maybe that’s what they were going for, but I’m sorry, it’s just uncomfortable to watch, and not in a good way.  If the tension was eased with some jokes, then okay, but there are none worth laughing at.  It goes from a mediocre story about comedians to a boring and awkward family drama.  And this is the entire second half of the movie.  It’s just a completely uneven film.

Now I want to talk about Adam Sandler.  Sandler is trying to make an effort to be a more serious actor.  He’s shown he’s got talent like in Punch Drunk Love.  The difference between Punch Drunk Love and Funny People though is that Punch Drunk Love is actually funny, so it makes Sandler’s performance stronger because he is in a better film.  He’s perfectly fine in Funny People, but the character just isn’t there.  The guy is supposed to be this wildly popular comedian, but he’s just flat out boring and uninteresting.  I don’t get it.  I think Sandler’s best stuff was Happy Gilmore and The Wedding Singer.  Maybe the stuffy critics will disagree with me, but that’s how I feel.  Those movies were gut bustlingly hilarious, whereas now Sandler does these half comedies/half dramas like Spanglish and to a lesser extent Click.  These movies blow bags as does Funny People.  I know he’s trying to grow up, but I guess part of me is selfish and wants him to go make Happy Gilmore 2.  I prefer him fighting Bob Barker and talking to invisible penguins rather than playing some dick head comedian who’s on death’s door.  But that’s me.

So if you are expecting a few good laughs at the movies, don’t see Funny People.  You’ll be bored to tears.  Maybe I wanted something different, but this one just annoyed the shit out of me with its pretentious inside jokes and lackluster characters.  If Judd Apatow is having a good time and laughing it up with his family and buddies then good for him…but as a moviegoer, it turns me off.  It feels like this – “Hey, look how much fun we are having in our little world and you’re only invited until the credits come on.”  I think comedies are suffering right now.  We either get an atrocious Will Ferrell piece of shit or these half-ass dramedies.  I miss the days of Dumb and Dumber, Wayne’s World, and Kingpin.  Clever writing, downright hysterical, and never took themselves too seriously.  The Seth Rogens and Will Ferrells just don’t compare to the talents in those movies.  Although I feel I might be alone on this…so be it.

Rating: 4.0 out of 10.

Movie Review – Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

Plot: Harry Potter returns for his 6^th year at Hogwarts.  Meanwhile, Voldemort and his followers grow in numbers, causing mayhem in both the wizard world and muggle world.  Harry and Dumbledore attempt to unlock Voldemort’s dark past in order to learn how to defeat him.

To be able to produce six movies of quality in the same series in less than 10 years is pretty damn impressive.  I like some better than others, but there has never been a bad Harry Potter movie.  Although some of them have hovered around the line of greatness, Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince gets pretty close to finally breaking it.  This is my favorite of the series so far.  The movie has its share of problems, but the good outweighs the bad by a lot.

Now I don’t consider myself a die hard Potter head, but I’m a pretty big fan.  There are a lot of diehards who always complain about how much is taken out of the books.  This annoys me a great deal because I think they do a remarkable job of adapting these 700 page epics into a solid 2 and a half hour movie.  This one was no different.  People need to realize that what works in a book may not work on film.  The filmmakers certainly took their share of liberties with the ending to Half-Blood Prince…and I loved it.  The climax is beautiful.  Its subtlety really works for the movie, where the book’s ending was more glorified and had a larger cast of characters.  That worked for the book, this works for the movie.  The fact that they cut out a lot of characters and events in the film’s climax makes the tension between the characters that really matter even stronger.  This is all credit to the director David Yates who also directed the previous installment.  The ending was strong in that one as well, and he delivers once again here.  I’m thrilled he’s attached to the final film.

There were some minor disappointments of scenes they cut from the book that I want to mention.  For example there is no Defense against the Dark Arts classes with Professor Snape as he tries to teach Harry and company how to use magical spells by thinking them.  This was a nice part in the book, and I think it would have made the ongoing Harry/Snape conflict even stronger.

The movie’s biggest weakness though is that its main plot suffers from too much time spent on teenage romance.  Not that they didn’t do a good job with the adolescent shenanigans, because they really do, but it should have been cut down to focus more on the main story which is Dumbledore and Harry exploring Voldemort’s past through memories.  When Yates does focus on this story, he does a great job.  We do learn about one of Voldemort’s dark secrets, but it’s not enough.  They really needed to incorporate 1 or 2 more memories from the book to clearly show what Harry needs to do in order to rectify Voldemort’s wrong doings.  It will seem a bit confusing to the outsiders who only watch the movies.  Also there are scenes from the book that further develop Voldemort’s character, which were unfortunately cut.

So what’s the best part about this movie?  The acting is phenomenal.  The acting has always been good in the Potter flicks, but everyone really steps it up here.  Daniel Radcliffe as Harry Potter has always been strong, but this is his best yet.  Newcomer Jim Broadbent as potions Professor Horace Slughorn was brilliant.  He’s crucial as his character essentially drives the film’s main plot.  Whether he’s being jovial or remorseful, Broadbent really nails all sides of the character.  More screen time with Alan Rickman as Professor Snape is always a good thing.  But the man who really steals the show is Michael Gambon as Professor Dumbledore.  His run as Dumbledore through out the series has been inconsistent and uneven, but he makes up for it here.  One scene I’ll remember for a while is when he is forced to drink a potion.  It’s a very intense performance.

Fans and non-fans will like this one quite a bit.  I do have to warn you though, if you are a casual Potter fan, make sure you have seen all the previous movies and pay attention to this one.  Like I said, I have been very impressed with this series.  I love that the same actors have remained throughout all six movies and will return for the last one.  I have very high hopes for the final, which is split in two parts.  Unfortunately if the finale fails, the entire series will fail, but I am confident David Yates and company will deliver a knockout.

Rating: 8 out of 10.

Movie Review – Public Enemies

Plot: In this 1930’s crime drama, Melvin Purvis leads the investigation to capture the notorious bank robbers lead by John Dillinger.

When I first heard about this one, I was pretty excited.  After seeing all the trailers though, I lowered my expectations quite a bit.  I was right to do so.  There is a lot to like here, but for the most part I found it underwhelming.  There are some fantastic individual scenes, but the movie as a whole can’t live up to the greatness of its actors.  The acting is very good, but the direction is weak, especially in the pacing.

Although there are moments of great tension such as scenes at a stop light and an interrogation, the pacing was a big problem overall.  At times it moved incredibly slow and it was a yawn fest, but would suddenly pick up to full intensity in a matter of seconds.  Sometimes this works in movies, but here it catches you so off guard, it becomes frustrating.  This is very apparent in one of the prison scenes.  It was very slow and the tension just wasn’t there, but suddenly it heats up.  It would have been stronger if I was on the edge of my seat right before it happened.  The movie also seems to have the same formula throughout the near 2 ½ hours.  Bank job-hiding out-shoot out.  Bank job-hiding out-shoot out.  It gets pretty tiresome.

I have to say though; the shoot-outs were the best scenes.  Why did I like them so much?  The sound.  Yea, I know.  Machine gun sound effects have only been used a billion times, but for some reason they stood out to me here.  They were so crisp and loud, but in a good way.  Just listening to the gun fire was worth it.  Also, watching the sparks come out of the guns looked real good.  They always had a perfect camera angle on it.  So if you really like gun fire, I would definitely see Public Enemies.

I thought the acting was solid, but unfortunately I just didn’t feel like you got to know these characters very well.  Johnny Depp does a good job as Dillenger, but there wasn’t much to it.  There are maybe three scenes where you get a good sense of who this guy is, but mostly it’s just a lot of close up shots of Johnny Depp looking intense.  It was disappointing, because in the rare moments Michael Mann decides to let you in on who Dillenger is, the dialogue is strong and the performance is great.  I needed more though.  Now Christian Bale as Melvin Purvis is all intense close up shots, but Bale does those so damn well, that I didn’t mind it as much.  And there are moments, especially when he’s back at his headquarters, where you get a good feel for who this guy is.  There is one scene between Dillenger and Purvis where they exchange some pretty intense dialogue.  I thought the best performance of the movie though was Marion Cotillard as Dillenger’s girlfriend Billie Frechette.  By far the best scene in the movie is her conflict with a cop towards the end.  It was some powerful stuff. 

I thought the climax was handled pretty poorly, but the very last scene was perfect.  So although there are moments of greatness, it was just an okay movie that had some damn good shoot-outs.  I just think that if these characters had more time to talk and interact with one another, the stakes would have been higher making the shoot-outs even better and more intense.  I mean come on; we have Johnny Depp and Christian Bale, let them act dammit.  It was just too jumbled a film to say it was good…it’s okay.

Rating: 6.0 out of 10. 

Oscars Cloned

So a little over a week ago, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences (Oscars) decided to double its Best Picture nominees to a whopping 10 instead of 5.  I just wanted to add my two cents on this issue.  I completely understand why they are doing this.  It will certainly increase viewers because it will actually include movies that people have seen.  But this whole thing annoys me a great deal, so let’s get into it.

First of all, how about the Academy just gets it right with 5 choices.  We need 10 now, come on!  So a lot of speculation on why the Academy is doing this in the first place is because they got blasted for ignoring Wall-E and The Dark Knight last year.  The Dark Knight absolutely should have been nominated for Best Picture.  It was loved by all moviegoers and critically acclaimed, appearing on several 2008 top 10 lists, including Richard Roeper, former co-host of At the Movies.  It also got nominated at the PGAs, DGAs, and WGAs.  So what the hell happened!  Everyone knows it’s an instant classic, yet the Academy didn’t have the balls to nominate it because the main character dresses like a bat.  If a movie about a pink elephant that plays poker on the weekends happens to be one of the best movies of the year, then it should be nominated, no matter what its context is.  They should be able to get it right with 5 picks.    

So what do I think some of the factors of a Best Picture should be?  Well I really think financial success should be taken into account somewhat when considering what the best movies of the year are.  I’m not saying Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen should be a Best Pic nominee or anything like that, but if a financially succussful movie is critically acclaimed and universally loved by all, then it deserves some consideration.  I think a movie that is talked about months after its release and gets people to go multiple times is a movie that truly impacts people.  Isn’t that what a Best Picture should be?  But now they can nominate the Dark Knights of the world because they are expanding to 10. But this leads me to my next complaint.

It pisses me off, because now the Academy has found a cheap loophole and will never have to give movies like The Dark Knight a Best Picture Oscar.  By increasing the total nominees to 10, the Academy can say, “We are now recognizing the movies that people actually see, so leave us alone.”  The problem is that this is actually a set back for movies like this because now there will never be hope of them actually winning.  They will just get tossed aside in the extra slots, but the Academy can say, “Hey, we nominated them.”  That’s bull shit!!  I’d rather see the Dark Knights of the world get in on one of the 5 slots rather than one of the 10.  

So what movies will suffer from this fate in 2009?  Well, it’s too early to tell, but I know of 1 that could fall into this.  Star Trek.  Everyone loved it, it’s a fantastic movie, and will certainly go down as one of the years best.  But it’s going to get nominated in one of the fake slots with no hope of actually winning.  Why do I call it a fake slot you ask.  How come none of the other categories are expanding to 10?  This means when the Best Director nominees are released, we’ll be able to decipher what movies actually have a chance of winning the big prize.  I hope I’m completely wrong about all this, believe me.  Like I said, it makes sense for the Academy to do this.  It’s a smart move, but I’d rather see them get it right with five.  Now it will never happen.

Movie Review – Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

Plot: The Autobots remain on Earth to help the Government search and destroy Decepticons.  Eventually they learn of an ancient enemy leader that plans to arrive on Earth and is in search of an energy source in which Sam Witwicky holds the key to finding.

When I walk into a Michael Bay film, I understand that the basic elements of plot and character development are flushed down the toilet, but one thing I don’t expect is to be completely and utterly bored out of my mind.  That’s what happened when I saw Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen.  The first movie is decent.  It’s solid action and the humor was tolerable and even sometimes funny.  But this sequel…it’s just atrocious.  Its elementary school humor, it’s cluttered with robots, but the worst part is that it moves so damn slow!  I wanted to take a nap. 

So what made the first Transformers work?  The robots were handled very well.  They are eased into the story and we get a sense of who they are.  There are a few choice Autobots and Decepticons and we accepted them as an audience.  This made us appreciate the battles.  In this one, it’s just a complete mess of robots from each side and I don’t even know what the hell is going on.  Who’s fighting who!  The only one I know for sure who I’m looking at is Optimus Prime, the Autobot leader.  So as good as the battles are in this movie, it doesn’t fricking matter, because I had to focus all my energy concentrating on who everyone was.  This is a Michael Bay movie, stop making me think. 

Another major problem is the damn jokes.  Oh my God.  I’m serious; it gets close to Batman and Robin territory.  What also made the first movie acceptable was that the robots didn’t talk that much except for Optimus Prime who should talk a lot.  And their voices are so annoying.  Especially annoying are these twin characters that are bright green and red.  They talk in stereotypes, and just to give you a real clear picture of these characters, one of them has a gold tooth.  But they weren’t even the worst robots for me.  That prize goes to an ancient Decepticon robot who talks in kind of a British accent.  There is this scene where he just rambles on and on, and you have no idea what he’s saying while the human characters are just screaming back incoherently.  I felt like I was at the fucking dentist.  I hated this character.  The only reason he’s not worse then Jar Jar Binks is because he doesn’t have many scenes. 

As far as the human characters go, they are tolerable.  But really, all they do is run around screaming.  “Optimus!!!!!!!!!!” “Sam!!!!!!!!” “Bumblebee!!!!!!!!”  Oh vey.  I like Shia LaBeouff.  I think he’s a good actor, I just wish he would do better movies.  I also think Megan Fox in the first movie was more than just eye candy and actually showed potential, but in this movie…yea, she’s just eye candy.  There isn’t one human character I can say I liked, but I didn’t hate any of them.  I guess that’s somewhat of a positive. 

The prime issue with this film is the pacing.  The first half was passable.  It was stupid, but I wasn’t bored and was somewhat entertained.  But the second half was horrible.  You have no clue what’s going on.  At one point its just Shia LaBeouff’s character Sam Witwicky running for 45 minutes shouting “Optimus” while the over the top and horrible score blasts in your ears.  You can’t even see any fighting as the screen is covered with sand and explosions.  It’s so grueling to get to the big final fight that we’re all waiting for, but even that was a huge letdown!  It’s like Michael Bay said, “Oooops, I guess I ran out of budget.”  Unbelievable. 

Well, was there anything I liked?  There was one fight early on in the forest that was pretty cool.  Why was it cool?  Because it was set in an area where you could clearly see what was going on.  Also, it was a clear one-on-two battle – you knew who was fighting and why.  So that was enjoyable.  I am impressed with the robot special effects.  These are big giant machines, but they don’t look too fake and are interwoven pretty well into the film.  Also there is a scene where one of the Decepticon leaders ties Sam Witwicky down to a car that got kind of dark and had some good voice acting.  I’m actually pissed because the teaser trailer gave me the impression that they were going to go a bit dark in this one and step it up from the previous entry.  Boy was I wrong. 

So all in all, for a movie about robots fighting, it’s excruciatingly boring.  If they cut 45 minutes to an hour, it would have been decent entertainment.  A lot people gave X-Men Origins: Wolverine a hard time, but that was an okay film for two reasons.  First, it moved at a quick pace.  It was in and out.  Secondly, it never hampered down into juvenile humor territory like this one did.  So please, stay away from this one and don’t fuel its success.

Rating. 3.5 out of 10.

-Danjewish